Metropoliplex

First of all, heed this warning:
Lead amount in lunchbags unsafe; feds didn't tell
Hurry - warn your kids - tell them "DO NOT EAT YOUR LUNCH BAG!!!"

I was in Marquette yesterday, on a last-second emergency trip which turned out well (I won't go into it - let's just say it was an "intervention.") Before my disastrous move to Iowa and then my return to what I consider a much more dismal part of the UP, I lived in Marquette for almost ten years. Since leaving shortly after the new year in 2001, I think I have probably been up there a total of 4 times.

When I left, I had mixed feelings - I loved the town in many ways, hated it in others, and had a love/hate relationship with the weather. Plus I was technically living in Negaunee, which is 8 miles from Marquette and, to put it bluntly, is NOTHING like Marquette. When the Iowa experience turned sour, my first instinct was that I would return to Marquette, having so much familiarity with it and also a few friends still hiding here and there. But due to monetary reasons, I ended up shacking up here, in a part of the UP that I can only describe as "midieival" (my apologies to some of you, who should agree with me anyway) and have since not left.

It is a funny place to live, the Upper Peninsula. I have been up here so long now that, when I venture into any city larger than a football field, I feel like I've wandered into the future, and that everyone is staring at my ignorance. Even Green Bay, which is 90 miles to the south, overwhelms me - I get overstimulated by the fact that there are more car dealerships than cars on the road. There are more restaurants on a single block than in the entire town of Iron Mountain. Seriously, Green Bay would seem small to any real city-dweller, yet there is enough shopping to supply every person in Africa with a pair of muffin-top jeans and a complete media center, with plenty of Starbucks coffee and Krispy Kremes to keep them chipper and non-starving.

You can imagine how I feel in Chicago. There are two things in Chicago that interest me - Ikea and Whole Foods - and nothing else. Seriously, it's mesmerizing and awe-inspiring to drive into the city, or any city like that, but by the time I leave I basically have post-traumatic stress disorder.

I didn't used to be that way - I've been to many cities, on two continents, and have had great times. But when you spend a little too long in Dickinson County, Michigan, with its total population of 27,000, and Walmart as its largest employer, you get, well, sheltered.

Anyway, my point. Marquette is sheltered too; in fact, it is a half-day's journey just to get to Green Bay. But for some reason, it thrives in a way that no other town in the entire UP does. It is bustling with little wisps of progress in every corner, all arriving in a more tasteful manner than in most large cities, where they just erect another mile of concrete on the outskirts for the newest menagerie of sub shops and megastores. And Marquette exists in a natural setting that is just so incredibly beautiful, it makes you forget that you are almost 200 miles from the closest interstate highway.

When I drive into Marquette, I feel like I never left, and yet there are always surprises - Marquette has now gone through the Starbucks Revolution, and is starting to realise its tourist potential. Driving through the perfectly preserved downtown area on a saturday evening, I saw people out everywhere, walking back and forth to real bars that have real music and live performers. In this area where I live, the bars have names like "the Whuh Bar" and "Who's Next" and the choice of live music is limited to about a total of 5 bands, their music stylings being a choice between eighties-hair or country. There is karaoke, but nobody that can sing, and the smell of urine is hard to distinguish from the smell of the cheap beer.

Anyway, every time I visit Marquette I remember it fondly for a few days after. If I really sat back and thought about all the miserable times I had there; or about the winter that I shovelled a total of 300 inches of snow that fell nonstop, just so I could park my car in the front yard; I would probably remind myself why I somehow haven't ended back up there. While it's beautiful in the summer and always enjoyable for a visit, Marquette has the same problems as the whole UP - horrible winters, seasonal affective disorder, and isolation. I remember meeting people in Marquette who had never left the UP - one lady was in her 20s and had never seen a real escalator before.

So while I've been pondering getting out of this town and finding somewhere else to settle and attempt to thrive, Marquette has popped to mind on occasion. But as much as I love it, it's just not a total change, which is what I need. And there's always a funny feeling when leaving a place behind and then returning months or years later - you feel like while you were gone, life went on and you were sort of replaced, and there's no niche for you anymore.

Anyway, when I was returning home and stopped in Iron Mountain at the only gas station open at 3am for a much-needed pee break, I noticed the clerk was having some sort of interesting conversation with a lingering customer. When I went to the counter to pay for a pop, the clerk interrupted their conversation and said to me,

"We were debating where a good place to live would be - basically any place but here we decided!" and then he laughed. And I laughed, said nothing, and left.